Boarding the Train
by Spheral3
Summary: The brothers had always been together as young adults, the two faced obstacles and trials that one could only imagine in nightmares. Yet now Alphonse can only sit and watch as his brother faces the greatest adventure yet, death. -Eden K


Boarding the Train

By Eden Killinger

Edward Elric sat in his bed, staring vacantly out the window. He was an old man, roughly ninety seven years old. Since he had burned down his home and had started his journey when he was twelve, he had gone through many events in his life. Along the way he had somehow stopped counting the months and had forgotten the exact date of his birthday, thus assuming his age as 97.

The old, former Alchemist could not tear his gaze away from the view of his window. Endless fields and rolling hills stretched as far as the eye could see. He didn't mind sitting there and just watching the breeze shake the leave in the tree, or watch as the birds sang in the morning light. After years and years of travel, he was finally content to just sit and enjoy farm life.

There came a soft knocking sound at the door. He turned his head, and in a raspy, worn voice he said,

"Come in."

"Oh, so you are up." Came the voice of his younger brother. Alphonse walked in, tall and proud as he looked to his brother. "You stay in bed for so long I thought you might have just decided to sleep the day away."

"Or died." He sniffed.

Alphonse's face hardened.

"I'd never think that."

"It's natural at this age." Edward arched an eyebrow at his brother's sensitivity. His brother shook his head, and softly closed the door behind him. Edward leaned back against his head board. He studied his brother, dressed in a handsome brown vest that covered his white button up shirt, brown slacks with a black belt. He hadn't lost a hair on his head, and had kept it short with his bangs parted to the left. Even with his caterax, Edward could tell that his brother was still as healthy as ever. "Speaking of which, isn't it time you acted your age as well?"

"Aren't I?"

"How come you haven't stop traveling the world and settle down with Mei somewhere yet?"

Alphonse chuckled as he pulled up a chair and sat by his brother's bedside.

"You know very well that that kind of life doesn't suit either of us. She and I are perfectly happy, thank you."

"Glad to hear it." He nodded. "So what brings you here?"

Alphonse went serious once more as he leaned forward on his knees. He studied his brother for a moment. Edward's gray hair had only a few strands of gold that remained. It was short and thin, but he had kept his style as much the same as he did when he was a kid. He was pale, his golden eyes had blue rimmed around the iris to show his caterax. His boney hands were thin, but overall he looked as though he were taking good care of himself despite his conditions.

"Winry called me here." He bit his lower lip before he continued. "She told me… the doctor said…"

Edward reached over and put a hand on his younger siblings shoulder. His smile was strong, much stronger than the rest of him looked.

"Don't worry Al, I'll say hi to mom and dad for ya when I see them."

"That's not—"

"Oh, and Mase Hughes as well."

Alphonse paused, the tears began to form in his eyes. He looked to his brother and chocked back as sob. Squeezing his eyes shut he buried his face in his hands. Edward looked to him, patiently.

"Alphonse…" they were silent once more. Edward watched as his younger brother fought to regain his composure. Edward swung his legs over the bed and sat up, then stretched his arms out to hug his brother. "Come on Al, don't act like this is out of the blue here." he whispered. "You and I have been to many funerals before, going to mine will be no different."

"It will. It'll be you we're burying." He felt like a child once more, watching his mother die. For a worldly man such as himself to cry over death like a child surprised the both of them. "I… I can't help it, damn it…!"

"You're getting all worked up over nothing, Al. I mean I feel it will hardly be any different; we've been apart for nearly half of our lives." he laughed.

"I know… but you've never… never been gone like this before."

"I'm not gone yet." he assured. He let go of Alphonse and rested against the wall. Al sat up and whipped his eyes, gazing at his brother with a smile on his face.

"I saw Hailey and Nicholas down stairs." He gave a small laugh. "Hailey's husband was holding the baby… it was a strange sight."

"Mmm." Edward nodded. "My children have their own children now… it is odd being a grandfather when neither us, nor our own children had that."

Alphonse nodded back. Edward took in a breath and smiled at him.

"How is your son, _Good Luck _Timothy?"

Alphonse gave a short laugh. "I have to admit something to you."

"Oh?"

"The Good Luck part of his name, Hao Yun, it was his mother's idea you remember?"

"Yes." Edward nodded, amused. "Hao Yun Timothy, what about it?"

Alphonse paused for a moment, unsure of what to say. Then he looked to his brother, a smile forming on his wrinkled face and he gave a laugh.

"Now don't you tell Mei, but I hate it."

Edward laughed along with his brother.

"You hate his name."

"Hao Yun Timothy? Of course I do. If I had it my way his name would have just been Timothy!"

"You've never said a word about it until this day." Edward continued to laugh. "You always did put everyone's happiness before your own. You old softy."

"Whose old in this room?"

"We both are." he waved him off. As the laughter died down, Edward began to cough. He covered his mouth with his hand as the disturbing phlegm ridden cough filled the room. Alphonse shifted uncomfortably and cast his gaze to the ground once more. After a few minuets Edward managed to regain himself, breathing steadily and not talking again for a while. His cough had lasted much longer than when Alphonse remembered seeing his brother only a few months ago.

"We may both be old," started Alphonse, "But it's not fair…"

Edward lifted his head to look at Alphonse, his breaths wheezed a bit as he lay there.

"What isn't?" he asked, in a raspy voice.

"I'm still a healthy man and you…" he couldn't bring himself to look at his brother. It was hard to see someone whom he had always known as strong and resilient to lay there looking so helpless and frail.

"It may not be fair to you, but this is what I spent years of our lives to achieve." He coughed again, but it quickly settled. They went silent once more.

Edward suddenly gave a very short laugh, stirring Alphonse from his thoughts.

"Alphonse," he laid down in bed, his head resting on his pillow as he pulled the covers up. "Have you ever believed in God?"

He sniffed in return, hardly amused.

"Don't start this…"

"No, I'm serious."

"So am I."

Edward turned his head up to look at him, questioningly.

"Did I misspeak?"

"Don't just go turning your morals around because you're afraid to die, brother. The only reason you're saying this is because…"

"Now hold on," he stirred from the covered, alarmed by Alphonse's harsh reaction. "I never said anything of the sort. I'm curious about you."

"What difference does it make?"

"Well, it's not like I have very much time to spread the word if you said yes." The airy and humored manner in which he had spoken did little to lift his brother's mood. Alphonse deflated in the next instant.

"Damn it, Edward," Alphonse stood up and walked over to the dresser. He leaned forward on it and grabbed the edged of the oak furniture. He was struggling to hold back the tears, biting his lip and trying to calm himself.

"Alphonse," came Edward's gentle voice. It was the voice he used to calm his brother down in the rare events that he ever did become riled. That one word sent Alphonse over the edge. His shoulders shook as tears spilled down his cheeks.

"I don't… I don't want to talk about…"

"It's alright if you have, Alphonse," said Edward. "I don't mind."

"It's not that I just… I just don't want to talk about it."

"Why?"

"This isn't you." He turned and looked to him. "You've never talked about this before. You hate god, you hate him and every lie made up about him! Don't think you can start talking about him just because you're…." he covered his face in shame, his shoulders shaking as he cried silently.

Edward did his best to fight the tears that formed at the corners of his own eyes. He whipped them away quickly before clearing his throat.

"Come here, Al,"

He remained where he was, breathing deeply and concentrating on not crying.

"Alphonse…" he lifted himself off the bed and stood up. His legs shook as he stepped, time had not been kind to the Hero of the People. Alphonse heard his footsteps and peeked out from behind his hand. He gasped when Ed's knees buckled. He was quick to catch him, it was very little effort for his brother was light.

"Hard head," Al muttered.

"Well what was I suppose to do?" Edward muttered. He frowned for a moment, then gently pushed away from his brother. Alphonse tried to hold onto him again, but dward swatted his hand away. "I can stand."

"For how long?"

Edward's look became fierce and he jabbed a finger in his little brother's direction. "Just because my body is this way, it doesn't mean I'm weak, alright?" he said in almost a yell.

Alphonse stared at his brother, waiting for the fit of coughs to come but it didn't. Edward was holding them back as he continued, his chest heaved slightly.

"Now I will show you that your brother is still the same guy as he always was." He turned and began walking back to his bed. It was only six steps away, but Alphonse watched his brother's stride over as best he could. His back was straight, his fists clenched as best they could, leaving a small space still, bit the fire in his eyes burned strong. He turned around and finally sat down on the bed, looking to Alphonse, his gaze softened. "I'm still me, Al. I may be boarding the train earlier than you this time… but don't think for a moment that it means I'm leaving you."

Alphonse stared at him for a moment, then his gaze softened to a smile.

"Are you in pain now?" he asked.

"Hell yes, but that's not the point."

"Lay down, brother." Alphonse sighed. He walked back over to the chair and sat down in it, smiling at him. "Alright… do you really want to know if I believe in god or not?" he asked.

Edward gave a nod, as a fit of coughs finally let loose. He covered his mouth, gasped and wheezed before settling down.

"The truth is," began Alphonse, "That I didn't ever really believe in him, but there were nights where I prayed…"

Edward turned his head to look up at Alphonse, waiting for him to continue. Alphonse gave a weak smile as he nodded.

"I prayed for us, for Winry and Aunty Pinako… I use to pray for mom and dad as well."

"Why?"

"I don't know really. I thought that if I could do something, anything to help— and praying obviously didn't hurt anyone or anything. I just did it, well just because…" he went silent, eyeing his brother's amused expression. "I know it was useless and whatever, but maybe it did help?" he shrugged. Edward continued to smile back at him, then eventually shrugged back.

"Ah, well."

"What?"

"Oh, it's Nothing."

"Ah, what is it?"

"No, it's nothing."

"Come on."

"Alright." he lay down fully in bed and looked up to the ceiling once more. "You want to know so bad. Well, I did it once to."

Alphonse paused, waiting for his brother to go on.

"It was just after… just after you were taken away by the Gate."

Memories of that day had always scared the two of them. They hadn't spoken of that day in over fifty years, since their first journey had ended and the nation had become a parliament one. Alphonse shifted in his seat and nodded for his brother to continue.

"When you were gone all I could do was scream and yell at God. I prayed for him to give you back to me. I cried out so loud… I was hysterical."

"That was it?"

Edward nodded. Alphonse was unsure of why his brother had spoke of that day again, or why the subject of god had even arisen. He felt sick to his stomach thinking about that day. He pushed the memories out his mind once more and leaned forward on his knees to look at Edward.

"Why bring that up?"

"You know that from that day on I hated God. I hated all the things he had done to us, and denied him to this day… actually, I still don't believe in him." He was silent again. He then turned his head to look at Alphonse. Golden orbs held fear in them, a vulnerability that shown through his thoughtful frown. "It makes me wonder though about where I'm going."

Alphonse paused, staring at him. His breath caught in his throat and all he could do was shake his head thickly.

"Y-You're not going anywhere… anywhere bad I'd think."

"I've wondered if I'll be dragged behind the gate… but then I remember that I had long since lost my ability to perform Alchemy. I just sit and wonder sometimes… where am I going?"

A pause. Alphonse thought of the many religions he had come across on his travels and their depictions of the afterlife. As he scrambled to conjecture a place in his mind, he found that he couldn't prompt one honestly believing it was where his brother would end up in.

"I don't know." Alphonse spoke in barely a whisper.

"In that way I feel my curiosity has been peaked again."

Alphonse paused, the question he wanted to ask held in his throat for only a moment longer.

"Your… curiosity?"

"About where I'll go, what I'll be… that sort of thing."

"Are you suggesting reincarnation?"

Edward merely gave a small shrug, then shook his head no.

"More like… well that's just it. I don't know."

"No one really knows."

"And I guess in that way… it excites me." A smile formed on his face. "In a strange way, I can't wait to die."

Alphonse stared at him, stunned for a moment. His gaze softened and he ran a boney hand through his hair.

"You always end up saying something that surprises me…" he reached out and placed his hand over his brother's. "But I guess I'm excited for you, too."

Edward smiled. Alphonse noticed how distant his eyes seemed. His heart skipped a beat for he recognized that look from so long ago, in green eyes instead of gold. H epushed back the very distant memory of his mother's eyes going as lifeless as Ed's.

Edward's smile stayed on his face, he blinked once.

"I'm glad." he nodded. He took in a deep breath and closed his eyes. "I guess I'm heading out now…"

"Wouldn't want you to miss your train." Al nodded. Tears fell from his face once more, but he was smiling this time.

"It's going to be a lonely trip without you…"

"I'll meet you there though."

"I know… make sure that you bring Mei with you when you do. I wouldn't want her to be lonely like Winry will be."

"She'll understand."

Edward didn't even nod, his breathing was becoming weaker and weaker ever few seconds. He opened one eye and looked to Alphonse, smiling.

"Good bye, Al."

"I'll see you soon." He nodded back. His brother closed his eyes once more and looked like he was sleeping. His chest steadily went up, then down, then up, then down, then… nothing.

Alphonse sat in silence next to his brother's body. He gripped his hand, still warm. He looked up and to the sky outside. Everything was bright and peaceful. He stood up and turned, going to the door to tell the family of his brother's passing. He paused for a moment, then closed the door he had just only opened to step out. He went and sat beside his brother once more and looked to him. He sat there silent, dwelling in his thoughts. He studied his brother's smiling face, then reached out and put his hand back on his brothers'.

"I just want to say… to say thank you for everything you've ever done for me. You've always been right there, looking out for me, protecting me, and making sure I was alright when you retrieved me from behind the Gate. We've never said it to each other, I guess it's just because it was the way you were. I want you to know… no, you already do know, don't you? I guess I just want to say… I love you, brother. Thank you for being so strong for all of us. I'll see you soon."

((When Edward tells Al to bring Mei with him, I had pictured an understanding for Alphonse and Mei to pass pleasantly in their sleep together— so no murder, just a pleasant good bye.))


End file.
